Getting your ex Boyfriend Back

The vast majority of the time when your girlfriend leaves you, it’s generally because of something really stupid you either said or did. That should probably come as no surprise to you. What may be surprising to learn is that dealing with these insane creatures called women doesn’t have to be so dang hard, not if you know what you’ve been doing wrong and can fix it!

And that’s where I come in. Due to my own personal experiences, I’ve become rather well-versed in the many things that we idiots can do to really tick off our lovely ladies and make them want to strangle us but settle for leaving us. I am here to help you avoid the gravest mistakes or fix the ones you’ve made, by providing this “for-men-by-men” guide to not making your woman leave you…or murder you.

1) Top thing that makes girls really itch for your throat is when you just don’t pay attention to her. Guys, you should know better. Women want to feel like their opinions and viewpoints matter to you. If they don’t get the feeling that they’re being heard when they talk for hours on end, they might stop talking to you altogether…and that’s NOT a good thing. A woman requires constant attention.

That can be a little tricky sometimes though…too much attention and she’ll think you’re an obsessed freak who collects strands of her hair and rolls them into little balls and puts them in a locked chest. Obviously this is an impression you want to avoid, so finding that balance is essential. Best advice is to just listen to her. Like, actually listen. She’ll TELL you what she wants. Usually.

2) Women have a term they use that as far as I can tell doesn’t really mean much. The term is “emotionally supportive,” and as best as I can cipher it basically refers to a man who can read women’s minds and know exactly what they want you to do or say at all the right times to make her feel loved. Basically they need a guy who listens well enough to know her as well as she knows herself.

There are a privileged few in the world of men who come by this talent naturally. I hate those scumbags, as I’m not one of them. If you’re like me, it requires a lot of attention and devotion to really pick up on all the little clues they give you as to exactly what they want. Really, if you can perfect item number 1, you can probably do okay with this one.

3) Oh my God, do NOT let a woman catch you cheating on her. And by that I don’t mean do it carefully, I mean don’t do it. Women may take slightly less offense to other women cheating on their men, but a man who cheats is sin itself and must be brutally destroyed by any means necessary. Most of us guys know it’s “bad” to cheat on a woman, but the majority of us may not know exactly what “cheating” is as a woman sees it.

Forget that other women exist. From now on, all women other than your girlfriend should be seen like you see your mother. She’s not a woman, right? She’s your mother. You do not TALK to other women. You do not LOOK at other women. You do not THINK ABOUT other women. You do not FANTASIZE about other women. All of these things are considered cheating and will get you slaughtered by a mob of angry girls.

4) For crying out loud, there is more trouble in the home than there has any right to be. When living with your girlfriend, simply accept the fact that you are GOING to help out around the house. You are fully capable of taking out the trash whether you want to or not, and if you know what’s good for you, you’ll just do what your girl says and hope she doesn’t make you sleep on the couch.

So that’s the main list of stupid things we guys do. You may be wondering about why this could really help you if you’re already broken up, and that’s a fair question. Fact is, not everyone who is broken up, STAYS broken up, and if you manage to get a second chance with her you do NOT want to make the same mistakes again. Also, addressing these potential problems can help you out a lot with any other women you end up dating in your life.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

Most of the time when your girlfriend dumps you…it’s not her, it’s you. Guys, we’re some of the dumbest oafs around when it comes to relationships, and we’re always doing SOMETHING wrong. Girls may not be the easiest creatures to understand, and relationships with them can be a bit difficult to manage…but really if you can figure out your problems you can solve them.

That’s why I’m writing this for you, as a friendly man-to-man resource for a few of the things we frequently do that tick our ladies off and make them want to leave. Sure there are women nice enough to painstakingly list off our every faults for us, but not every guy is so lucky as to have one. Not to worry, bro…I will help you through this madness.

1) First main thing that girls really despise when men do is when they don’t pay attention to them. This really drives a girl nutso, because it can feel like they require our every waking moment to be devoted to them and only them, or else we don’t love them. Of course this assumption is completely false, but girls seem to need us to pay constant attention to them.

NOT paying constant attention to them makes them think we don’t love them, but when we DO pay constant attention to them they start acting like we’re freaks. There IS a happy medium somewhere in there, but the exact level varies for each girl. Best solution here is to simply listen to her and figure out what she specifically needs, attention-wise.

2) There’s this concept that women have, called “emotional support.” They need their guys to be “emotionally supportive” of them. Best as I can figure it, it’s kinda related to item number 1 on this list, but a little more expansive. Girls need to feel like their guys really understand them, and can get to know them almost as well as they know themselves.

Guys who can do this naturally are referred to as having “game.” This simply means that a guy is naturally good at reading women and understanding the things to say and do to make their hearts melt. Your supreme goal here is to make the girl feel like she and her feelings are both very important to you…and the best way to do this is to really listen to her and read her body language.

3) Women really kinda hate it when guys cheat on them, even if some of these same girls would gladly cheat on their guys. Of course we all realize this is a no-no, and wouldn’t be too happy if our girls cheated on us…but sometimes we either have a momentary lapse of stupidity, or we don’t realize what exactly constitutes “cheating” in the female mind.

You don’t have to have sex with another woman to be “cheating.” A lot of the time all it takes is a single look of appreciation at another woman’s finer physical “assets” for your girlfriend to take offense. Even fantasies about pornstars or celebrities can be a no-no, it just depends on the girlfriend. Best and safest bet is to forget that other girls exist, and think like they’re just other guys who look different.

4) When you’re living with a woman, helping around the house can become a sore point…she expects you to do it, and you don’t want to. I understand not wanting to get up and clean stuff or take out the trash, but you have to really consider whether or not it’s worth ticking your girlfriend off. Take my advice…just get up off your lazy butt and do a few chores.

So how does this help you if you’ve already broken up with her? Well, once you can identify the things you’ve done wrong in the past, you can start working to avoid doing them in the future. Whether it’s with your now-ex-girlfriend or with a new woman, you’ll be much less likely to make her leave again if you can keep from making these idiot classic “guy” blunders.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

It’s a general rule that when your girlfriend decides to leave you, you’ve done something wrong. Chances are, you’ve done a lot of somethings wrong. Fellas, we’re pretty accurately labeled as the dumber of the two genders, and when dealing with creatures as confusing as women, it’s not surprising that we make blunders that make them leave. HOWEVER, we CAN deal with them if we know how.

So that’s why I’m here, to list off the main stupid things we often do to anger our lovely, gentle little flowers and make them grow thorns. What’s more, I’m going to tell you how to get through the stupid things we do, at least the ones I’m covering in this article. Here’s a resource written for a man, by a man, to deal with women in relationships.

1) Number one thing that women hate about guys is that they just don’t pay attention to their ladies. Sure she talks a lot, but it’s USUALLY a good idea to listen to her. Even if she’s talking about things that make absolutely no sense to you, you need to pay attention to her and act like you understand. If she doesn’t get constant attention when she’s speaking, somehow you don’t love her.

Of course, this can be a bit contrary sometimes. You don’t want to pay TOO MUCH attention to her, because that’s considered “weird” or “scary.” Achieving a balance is very difficult, as you have to pay enough attention to satisfy her without hanging on her every word and freaking her out. Since every girl’s different, best idea is to simply listen to figure out exactly what she needs.

2) There’s this term women use…it’s called when a guy is being “emotionally supportive” of his woman. This term means absolutely nothing as far as I can figure…basically it’s just a way of measuring how well a guy knows his girl. It’s kinda related to List Item #1, but a bit expanded. Women are looking for when a guy pays enough attention to a girl so that he knows her almost as well as she knows herself.

There are a few lucky guys out there who come by this naturally, and those are the guys who have “game.” Women naturally love these fellas, because the boys naturally understand the women and what makes them happy. What to say, what to do…it varies from woman to woman, and only astute observation and attention paid to detail can make up for a lack of natural talent here.

3) Of course, there’s the hot-button issue of “cheating” on one another. When girls do it to their boyfriend, it’s not nearly as bad as when a guy does it to his girl…at least by their standards. Heck, most of us know how bad it is, but as I’m sure I’ve said before…we’re idiots. It gets even worse when you realize exactly what constitutes “cheating” in the female mind.

You see, having sex with another woman is only the most extreme case of cheating. Talking to other women, looking at other women, even fantasies including other women can all be considered cheating as far as girls are concerned. Sure, girls can flirt all they want with whoever they want, but to us guys it’s best that we forget that girls other than our ladies even exist…they’re all just funny-looking guys with long hair.

4) And of course, there’s always going to be trouble at home. What I mean is, if you live with your girlfriend…there’ll be issues about how you divide up housework and household responsibilities. Rarely does this in itself end a relationship, but refusing to take out the trash can be a breaking point. Do yourself a favor…do what she tells you. It’s just easier that way.

So why am I telling you all this? What good does it do you if you’ve already broken up with her? Well, this has been a list of things you could do WRONG, right? Well, how about you stop doing these things? It’ll make your future relationships better, and if you manage to get your ex girlfriend back, you’ll have a lot better chance of making it work this time.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

It’s a general rule that when your girlfriend decides to leave you, you’ve done something wrong. Chances are, you’ve done a lot of somethings wrong. Fellas, we’re pretty accurately labeled as the dumber of the two genders, and when dealing with creatures as confusing as women, it’s not surprising that we make blunders that make them leave. HOWEVER, we CAN deal with them if we know how.

So that’s why I’m here, to list off the main stupid things we often do to anger our lovely, gentle little flowers and make them grow thorns. What’s more, I’m going to tell you how to get through the stupid things we do, at least the ones I’m covering in this article. Here’s a resource written for a man, by a man, to deal with women in relationships.

1) Number one thing that women hate about guys is that they just don’t pay attention to their ladies. Sure she talks a lot, but it’s USUALLY a good idea to listen to her. Even if she’s talking about things that make absolutely no sense to you, you need to pay attention to her and act like you understand. If she doesn’t get constant attention when she’s speaking, somehow you don’t love her.

Of course, this can be a bit contrary sometimes. You don’t want to pay TOO MUCH attention to her, because that’s considered “weird” or “scary.” Achieving a balance is very difficult, as you have to pay enough attention to satisfy her without hanging on her every word and freaking her out. Since every girl’s different, best idea is to simply listen to figure out exactly what she needs.

2) There’s this term women use…it’s called when a guy is being “emotionally supportive” of his woman. This term means absolutely nothing as far as I can figure…basically it’s just a way of measuring how well a guy knows his girl. It’s kinda related to List Item #1, but a bit expanded. Women are looking for when a guy pays enough attention to a girl so that he knows her almost as well as she knows herself.

There are a few lucky guys out there who come by this naturally, and those are the guys who have “game.” Women naturally love these fellas, because the boys naturally understand the women and what makes them happy. What to say, what to do…it varies from woman to woman, and only astute observation and attention paid to detail can make up for a lack of natural talent here.

3) Of course, there’s the hot-button issue of “cheating” on one another. When girls do it to their boyfriend, it’s not nearly as bad as when a guy does it to his girl…at least by their standards. Heck, most of us know how bad it is, but as I’m sure I’ve said before…we’re idiots. It gets even worse when you realize exactly what constitutes “cheating” in the female mind.

You see, having sex with another woman is only the most extreme case of cheating. Talking to other women, looking at other women, even fantasies including other women can all be considered cheating as far as girls are concerned. Sure, girls can flirt all they want with whoever they want, but to us guys it’s best that we forget that girls other than our ladies even exist…they’re all just funny-looking guys with long hair.

4) And of course, there’s always going to be trouble at home. What I mean is, if you live with your girlfriend…there’ll be issues about how you divide up housework and household responsibilities. Rarely does this in itself end a relationship, but refusing to take out the trash can be a breaking point. Do yourself a favor…do what she tells you. It’s just easier that way.

So why am I telling you all this? What good does it do you if you’ve already broken up with her? Well, this has been a list of things you could do WRONG, right? Well, how about you stop doing these things? It’ll make your future relationships better, and if you manage to get your ex girlfriend back, you’ll have a lot better chance of making it work this time.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

If you’re serious about getting back together with your ex boyfriend, let me tell you that it’s not going to be easy by any means. Any healthy relationship is give-and-take, with a healthy helping of compromise and sacrifice…but if you take my advice, your fight to get him back can be a little less difficult.

It’s a pretty reasonable assumption that if your ex was the one who did the leaving, it’s because of one of two things. Either he was getting tired of the relationship growing stale from lack of activity between you two, or he was running for his life from a woman who couldn’t let go and let him live his own life. Either of these two possibilities is plenty enough reason for a man to want to leave.

Getting him back after he’s run away like that isn’t a picnic in a sunny park, but if you stop doing the things that made him want to leave you, you have a pretty decent shot of fixing your mistakes. Take a look at yourself and the relationship, and figure out what things that led to the breakup were your fault…and yes, a lot of it will be your fault. Not playing blame games, just saying that generally the person doing the leaving is having an issue with the person being left.

So take a good look at your relationship problems. There are a lot of different things that could lead to a relationship’s demise, but if the biggest one was one that I mentioned, I can help you out a bit.

If your biggest problem was a lack of activity in the relationship that led to it getting stale, it’s really pretty sad. There’s no excuse for letting a relationship just peter out and expire. If you two love each other, you should do things with each other…spend time with one another, and live your lives together. Being bored with your partner is a tragedy that shouldn’t ever get the chance to occur.

If you were being a bit controlling and refusing to back out of his personal matters and let him live his own life, you need to realize that boxing the guy in isn’t going to prevent his escape. Oh sure, we laugh when we see a guy being hounded by his girlfriend on TV, but in real life it’s a different matter. Having somebody constantly looking over your shoulder and nagging you is horrible, and even if you feel you’re entitled to butt in everywhere, you need to relax a little and have some confidence that he can run his own life.

After the breakup, give your boyfriend some space and time to pull himself together. A breakup is hard on both people, and pressing him now is a bad idea that could only seal the deal. Instead, do this self-evaluation and work I’ve been talking about, and when the time is right you can contact him again. However, when you DO contact him, make sure you’re keeping it light and simple. Too much too fast won’t help you.

If you play your cards right in the initial contact, you guys will probably start seeing each other again face to face. When you get to this point, it’s a smart idea to spend your time together doing things you both always enjoyed as a couple. Doing this stirs up happy memories and paints a better picture of you in his eyes. It could even rekindle some feelings.

And while you guys are spending time together, be sure to allow the work you’ve been doing on yourself to shine out and be noticed. Don’t wave a yellow neon flag that says “hey look what I did,” but if you let it speak for itself, the work you’ve done will probably impress him to no end.

Where you go from here is up to you. I can’t say that any given method will have a 100% success rate, but the advice I’ve given you here is pretty much priceless. If you’re careful in your execution and sincere in your dedication to fixing the problems, you have a very good shot of getting your ex boyfriend back.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

One of the worst times in your life is when the love of your life has broken up with you. A lot of people have a hard time recovering from it, and their lives just kinda seem to slow to a stop. Don’t let this happen to you…there’s hope beyond a breakup, even that you could get your ex back!

That’s right, you read it right. You could get your ex back. Now, I ain’t saying it’s going to be easy…but it’s a shot, and let me let you in on a little secret: even if it doesn’t work out to get you back together with your ex, taking this path will still make you a lot happier.

So how do you take the first steps on this “road to happiness?” Well, you’ve already taken the first one. You’re reading this article, which means you’ve acknowledged to yourself that your life needs some change, and that you’d like to get your ex back. From here, you just need to take some action, and I’ll tell you how!

At this point, you either know what went wrong in the relationship or you don’t. If you don’t know what the true problems were that led to the breakup, you need to sit down and figure it out. Don’t call your ex and ask, this is something YOU need to do. Identify what the problems were, and what’s more…identify which ones were your fault. And don’t be naive…if your ex broke up with you, it’s a good shot the problem lies with you. I don’t mean to be cruel, but it’s just how it is.

You should actually be thankful that the problems are with you. Those sorts of problems, you can deal with. If your problem was just that your ex girlfriend was a bossy, controlling cheater…what could you really do? You can’t change others, only yourself…so be happy that you have something to work on that can make a real difference.

So yeah, figure out what YOU did wrong in the relationship, whether it was something you actively did or something you neglected to do. Whatever it was, do your best to fix it. Make some sacrifices if you need to, but change your wicked ways! Take those things that drove your partner away, and make them as nothing. Turn bad habits into positive habits. If you’ve let yourself go physically, whip yourself into shape! It’s hard, I know…self-work is draining and difficult…but you’ll be oh-so-happy when you’ve accomplished it.

Because you need to realize that YOU as you WERE were not enough to make that relationship stick, and chances are any other relationships would be hard-pressed to endure as well. You need to not just adopt some new behaviors, but change as a person while retaining the basics of who you are that drew your ex to you in the first place. It’s complicated I know, but don’t dwell on that…just do it!

And when you’ve done all you can, and all the things about you that led to the death of your first relationship have met their own demise, you’re ready to make contact with your ex again. Keep it light, start off really simple and easy…and slowly rebuild contact. Let your ex see who you are as opposed to who you were. You never know what kind of sparks could fly.

And you know, here’s where the “even if it doesn’t work you’ll still end up happier” part comes in. There’s always the chance that your ex just simply isn’t interested anymore. Even if that’s the case, the new and improved you is still going to be much more successful than ever before! You’ll feel good about yourself because you know you’re a catch, and that self-confidence paired with all the reasons for the self-confidence will make you look super-attractive. You’ll be more popular than ever before amongst members of the opposite sex, and you’re pretty much destined to find somebody who makes you even more happy than your ex ever did.

So take this advice to heart…make the changes that will change your life. You have nothing to lose by this but the hopeless sorrow you’re feeling now from the breakup, and you have everything to gain. Good luck, my friend. Go get em!

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

When your ex breaks up with you, it can be a really painful time. Things in your life can seem to lose meaning, and you may even question whether it’s worth even trying anymore. Well, SNAP OUT OF IT! If you DO try, you can pull your life back together and quite possibly even get your ex back!

Things don’t have to end where your ex left you…you just have to do 3 things: thinking about what went wrong, fixing what went wrong, and showing your ex that you’ve fixed what went wrong. Now, that’s a really simple way to put it, and it may be a little misleading…so I’ll elaborate on each point.

Thinking about what went wrong doesn’t consist of sitting on your couch sobbing into a bucket of ice cream moaning to yourself about what’s the matter with you. This step is a lot more in-depth, and you MUST remember that this is all about YOU. 9 times out of 10, when a person in a relationship breaks up with his or her partner, it’s because that partner is either not meeting the needs of that person or is doing things to drive that person away.

Either can kill a relationship, even one that was once close. People have certain expectations and needs concerning what they get out of a relationship. That may sound like a selfish take on it, but it’s simple facts: a person isn’t going to stay in a relationship that isn’t satisfying him or her…and of course somebody won’t stay with another person who’s driving him or her away.

You need to analyze your relationship, and figure out which you were doing. Were you pushing your ex away, or were you not providing for your ex’s needs? Once you’ve come to understand what wasn’t going right, you can work on fixing it.

Now, first thing you need to remember about fixing it, is that you can only work on the things that are the matter with yourself. I don’t care how unfair or flawed you think your ex was, you can’t do anything about him or her…only yourself. And keep in mind, this is going to take some real sacrifice and compromise…it’s not just a simple temporary fix, you need to really change yourself and make those things that killed the relationship go away.

That’s not going to be easy, but if you really work hard at it and make yourself a better person than you were when you were with your ex, you could have a real chance at getting your ex back.

The last big thing to do once you’ve identified and dealt with the problem is to show your ex all you’ve done. This shouldn’t be a blatant phone call saying “lookie what I did, I’m better now!” Contact should be gradual, unobtrusive, and nonconfrontational. You’re reinitiating contact not because you want to get back together, but because you care about the person and how he or she is doing.

Once you’ve broken the ice again and you’re spending time with one another again, let the changes you’ve made to yourself speak for themselves. If you did a good job on yourself, your ex will notice…and chances are you may become attractive again.

Now, there’s no guaranteed formula that will get your ex back. Everybody is different, and sometimes things are just too broken between people to be fixed and made anew…but I CAN guarantee you that doing this self-work is going to make you a lot happier. Even if your old relationships don’t start up again, your new ones will be a lot happier, and perhaps you’ll come to realize that life after a breakup isn’t the end, but the beginning.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

Breakups suck, they really do. If you’re going through one right now, I doubt I have to tell you that. Chances are, you could be thinking such things as “why me?” and “what did I do?” Well, there are a couple particular things that women usually do that contribute heavily into the end of a relationship, and I’m here to tell you what they are so that you can see if maybe they might apply to your case, because once you can identify the problems you can usually fix them.

These things are so common that they can almost seem like cliches, as you’ve probably seen them in almost every romantic comedy ever made. Yes…I’m a guy and I’ve seen quite a few of them. Don’t look at me like that, I have a good relationship with my mother and she likes to watch those sorts of movies…

But anyways, you’ll probably recognize these as things you’ve seen before, so you run a good chance of being able to do something about them. Not only will I tell you what these problems are, but I’ll draw from my vast basin of chickflick knowledge to tell you how to help heal a relationship that’s been disrupted by each. (Just kidding, I know a little more about this stuff than just what I’ve seen in movies!)

1) One of the all-time number one ways to make a guy run away screaming and tearing his hair out is to be obsessively, overwhelmingly, incessantly needy. Being all clingy, talking about the dreaded feelings, using the “L” word way too fast and way too often…these make a guy feel trapped, confined, and claustrophobic. A guy who is faced with an overly affectionate girl generally wants to get OUT as fast as possible. It’s just too much to have to handle being smothered like that…guys need some breathing room!

A relationship that’s been ended by a guy running away from this is pretty difficult to mend, as the poor man’s probably terrified of you…but it can be done. You’ll have to seriously kick yourself in the rear and straighten out this kind of behavior, but really getting any relationship back together is going to require some self-change. You just have to try really hard to not be so oppressive and controlling in your affections. This kind of thing can also bleed over into being really bossy as well…a lot of guys like strong women, but very few like being ordered around. These two things are fairly related, which is why I sorta lumped them together…they both make the guy feel trapped…and the only way to heal a relationship like that is to give the poor man some freedom.

2) Another reason why a lot of guys end relationships is because it’s all gotten stale and boring. I’m not saying you need to “spice things up” in the bedroom, as that’s only one type of this sort of problem. More often than the sex getting boring is when the relationship itself gets boring. When the two of you don’t pay much attention to each other anymore, when you don’t really do anything fun and exciting anymore…that’s what I’m really talking about here. Being stuck in a relationship where every conversation is the same, and nothing has any “flavor” anymore…it’s as frustrating as being stuck with a controlling she-demon, and guys can go stir-crazy from it.

Working on a boring relationship is probably the easiest of problems to fix. Just find things you both enjoy doing, and do them together! Sex doesn’t count, unless a serious lack thereof is the chief problem. Find ways to make your relationship more enjoyable for both people…remember that even if you’re satisfied, he may not be…and for a relationship to work out, bother people really need to be happy.

3) I can’t say I really wanted to mention this, but today it’s been getting to be more and more of a problem…cheating on one another is a really serious thing that usually ends all but the strongest relationships…or the oddest, but that’s another story. It’s been kind of stereotyped as a guy’s thing to cheat on his girlfriend or wife, but these days it happens just as often – if not MORE often – with a girl cheating on her man. There’s no excuse for this, there’s really no reason why a person should betray their love’s trust like that, but people do. I’m sure that if this is applicable to your case, you already know it…you probably hate yourself for it too, so I’m not going to berate you about it.

However, nothing really shatters a relationship like your partner being unfaithful. It’s such a betrayal that healing and accepting it is close to impossible. Not only do you feel betrayed when your partner cheats on you, but you start questioning yourself as well, wondering why you weren’t enough for the person you love. Sometimes you even start to question whether or not your partner ever really did love you. It’s a serious wound, and healing is a really hard process. People have worked it out before, but it requires a lot of tentative care when going about mending such a severely broken heart. Best thing to do is give him some space…if you end up being able to talk to each other again, there could be some hope, but for now it’s best to back off a bit.

Whatever the problem is that caused the fracture in your relationship, absolutely essential to healing the relationship is to never repeat the offense, especially in the last case. A strong relationship can bounce back from almost anything, but not if whatever hurt it originally continues to tear at it. Identifying the problem and stopping it from ever happening again is the first and most important step to rebuilding your ex’s trust and eventually getting back together with him.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

When your boyfriend dumps you, it can be pretty tough to figure out where to go from there. Chances are, you’re not exactly happy with not being with him…but I can tell you one thing, and that’s that sitting on the couch with a bucket of Blue Bunny won’t get him back. There are, however, things you can do to get back on your feet and even get him back!

Now, when a guy breaks up with a girl, it’s usually because he’s either angry with her and acting impulsively (in which case he’ll probably realize his mistake and getting back together will be fairly easy), or that there’s something going on with the girl that’s just not satisfying what he needs in a relationship. Ladies, I’m sure you can understand about a guy having relationship needs and expectations…they’re just a little bit different than the things girls typically require.

Guys really don’t need much, we just want a girl who’ll be a lot of fun to be with. Now, that can mean different things for different guys, but it’s a fairly reliable baseline. Mainly we like to have a relationship stay interesting without getting to be too much to handle. Guys’ emotional ties aren’t nonexistant, but we ARE built to be a little bit more “roaming” in nature…so even if we’re madly in love with a woman, most of us aren’t going to stick around if she drives us absolutely bonkers.

So the way I see it, if he left you it’s probably because of one of two things: either you let him slip away, or you drove him away. I know that’s harsh, but it’s the basic concept here. Letting him slip away means that the relationship just wasn’t exciting enough for him…this doesn’t mean that the sex was dull or that you’re a boring person, all it means is that there just wasn’t enough going on, not enough really enjoyable companionship. Maybe you guys didn’t go out enough, maybe the two of you could never agree on something fun to do together, maybe you worked too much and didn’t have time for him…there’s no telling…but I’m sure you can understand how that would make him feel.

The other possibility is that you kind of chased him out. It’s funny on TV when a woman throws a dish at a guy in a fight and it shatters on the wall beside his head, or when a girl calls him up on the phone every three minutes to demand what he’s doing, but in real life it’s an absolute nightmare. No matter how hot the woman is or how amazing she may be, a controlling girl will make a man run like his backside’s on fire. And a woman may not even realize how demanding she’s being!

So how does all this help you get your ex boyfriend back? Well, the first step to doing just that is to figure out what you did wrong in the relationship, and how you can correct it. You may not want to think about the possibility that your guy was either bored or scared of you…but why else would he leave?

Thinking about this stuff may hurt, but it’s necessary if you want to get him back and KEEP him. Remember that if you get back together with him and you’re still doing the things that made him leave the first time, he’s going to leave again…and this time you may not be able to get him back.

So take some time to think about what things you may have done to contribute to the breakup. Even if he did have some reasons other than your behavior, there was definitely SOME responsibility on your shoulders. “It’s not you, it’s me” is a lie…there’s always at least a little bit of it that’s you. So your first step is to figure out what part of it WAS you. Once you’ve done that, you can work your hardest to stop doing whatever it was.

It’s already been established that the two of you as you were failed to be relationship compatible in the long term…and he’s not going to be changing, so you’re the one who has to do the changing to make you two more compatible. Changing yourself is probably the hardest thing in the world, but if you seriously love the guy and think you two could have another shot at being truly happy, I’d expect you’re willing to at least give it a try.

So do everything you can to fix whatever problems you had that made him want to leave, and then break back into contact with him very gently. No “relationship” talk…no “feelings” talk…just “hey, how you been?” Start slowly. Build slowly. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and a relationship that’s fallen through is infinitely more complex. Take it slow, and eventually you’ll get back to the point where you’re really talking and spending time again.

Use this time to do things together that always made the two of you happy, and let him see the new, better person you’ve become. If he’s not a shallow dirtbag who dumped you for some other girl who promised him new sexual horizons, he’ll see how much you’ve tried to make things better…and you’ll have a good shot at getting him back.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.

Going through a sudden breakup can be absolutely horrible. Some people think it’s the worst thing that can happen in your lifetime short of somebody dying. A lot of the times, in the event that your partner is the one breaking up with you, it’s not uncommon or selfish to want to get back what you had together and try to get back together with your ex.

When somebody cuts a relationship short and decides to end it, it usually means that his or her needs weren’t being met in the relationship. Something obviously wasn’t being done that should have, or something was being done that had no place there. In order for an unhealthy relationship such as that one to be healed and made anew, there are going to have to be some changes made that remedy the things that caused the breakup, or else the second time will fail just like the first.

Before you start actively trying to win back your ex, you should really stop and think about the things that caused the breakup and how to fix the things that are your fault…and yes, if he or she broke up with you, there were things that were your fault. You need to think about what changes you need to make with yourself and whether or not you can manage to make and sustain them. If you don’t think you can handle what’s going to be required of you, you need to get the idea of a reunion with your ex out of your head.

But if you think that you can do it, then you’re already on the right track. The first thing to do is re-establish contact with your ex. This can be done via a phone call, a text message, an email…whatever, really. It’s just important to keep the initial contact free of any really heavy emotions…the last thing you want to do is scare the person away…and I’m pretty sure you can understand how a call out of the blue professing your undying love for a person can be at least a little intimidating.

From there, you can start to rebuild a relationship with your ex. At first it should merely be friendly, but eventually you’ll get to be able to spend some time with him or her again, at which point you should do things that you previously really enjoyed doing as a couple. Whatever it is…walks on the beach, sitting in the park, even playing a video game you both passionately enjoy…it should serve to remind both of you of how much you loved spending time with one another, about how great things could be when you were together. It opens doors that you may have thought closed.

How you act right now is key to whether or not you’ll be able to forge a new relationship out of the ashes of the old…girls, being clingy and emotional right now could seriously scare a guy away…guys, pay real attention to her and make her actually feel how much you care about her by really listening. This is a delicate process, and you don’t want to do anything to anger or spook the person you’re so desperately trying to get back.

When you’re spending time with your ex, make it apparent that you’re putting a lot of effort into fixing the problems with yourself that led to the breakup in the first place. The amount of work you’re doing on yourself will probably impress the person and help them to realize just how much they mean to you.

Just keep on the path you’re headed, and things should smooth out and hopefully things will patch themselves up. Don’t forget that the changes you make to yourself are perhaps the most important factor in helping the “healing” process along. If you don’t think you can handle the changes that are necessary, don’t even waste your time trying to get back with your ex…it’ll only lead to more heartbreak in the future, and that’s not fair to you or the one you love.

Just break up? Get instant relief from break up pain and a proven plan to get your ex back.