I know it sounds completely opposite to what you expect would work for getting your ex back, but the truth is severing all contact with your ex for about a month can really help you get him back when that month is over. There are numerous reasons why this is so, and here are just a couple.
1) If you’ve been fighting with someone, isn’t it usually helpful to take a break from them rather than risk even more fighting? This is definitely the case for freshly broken-up couples, especially when you intend to eventually give it another go. Staying in each others’ faces will just cause more conflict, so break it off for about a month.
After that month of peace, you and your ex will be a lot less actively hostile. Breakups spin a lot of emotion around, and once that’s settled some real healing can begin…but not before. If you give yourselves this break, the results will be way more successful.
2) Just because you’re not actively fighting, don’t think this doesn’t apply to you. Even the nicest post-breakup relationship needs to have a break in it if you ever want to rekindle old feelings. If you two are still together after the separation, it’ll be like you never did break up and your ex won’t feel any need to get back together.
It’s like the old expression “you don’t appreciate what you have until it’s gone.” If you’re still there, he can’t miss you, and he won’t full understand what he’s missing out on by having broken up with you. If you’re still friendly after a breakup, there’s still something there that could be a seed for another shot…but if he never understands that he really doesn’t have you anymore, he won’t feel the need to take you back.
3) When everything’s going to pieces, and your ex is right in front of you all the time, it can be hard to make the right decisions. Flying by the seat of your pants reacting instead of just acting, you’ll find it a lot tougher to work this out. What you need is some time and space alone to develop a plan of action.
People in this situation can act really oddly, and to get the results you want you may not be able to just naturally come to the right choices. You have to have a plan, or you’re shooting in the dark and will probably end up hitting yourself in the foot. This freedom of time and space will let you reason out a plan that will actually work, rather than just doing whatever feels right (since it’s often actually the wrong idea).
Any person fresh out of a breakup with the intention to get her ex back should take this advice seriously. You’ve seen a few of the reasons, so I’m sure you understand the benefits of this separation…actually doing it can be hard. It’s tough to be apart from the person you care for, but in some ways that’s what you’re banking on. Just rest assured that this will help, and when you get through it you’ll find it much easier to find happiness again with your ex. I wish you the best of luck.
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